4:30 am
by Nameless-Anonymous-Author
Summary: 24 hours in the life of Hyuga Neji. Angst.


Disclaimer: Standard

beta: none

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><p><em>4:30 am<em>

Neji awakes and for a moment forgets. Instead of cool, slick silk under his hands he feels warmth, toned muscles and scarred skin. He smells cinnamon and steel instead of cloth and blood. For a brief second he sees half-lidded eyes and slow smiles instead of empty darkness.

Neji does not forget for long.

_4:40 am_

He's sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in his hands and he can almost imagine a warm breath on his neck, a voice thick with sleep whispering good morning. He can almost hear her soft, barely audible steps padding around the empty kitchen. He almost apologizes for not pouring her a cup as well.

Neji leaves before he can finish his coffee.

_5:00 am_

Neji arrives at the training fields. There is a rustle in the trees but he doesn't look because she never makes noise. He stretches and warms himself up. When he is ready he begins his run, and in the cool, eeriness of the mist in Konoha mornings he is absolutely alone.

He automatically makes room on the path for someone who is not there.

_7:00 am_

Neji begins his taijutsu regiment. Push ups, pull ups, lunges, squats, crunches, planks - the lot. As the sun rises, it illuminates the field and the lone man that monopolizes it. Sweat traverses down the terrain of his shirtless, muscular torso, gliding into every crevice and rising over every plain. There is pain that ignites in his muscles and the burning sensation everywhere, but it isn't enough.

He hears the thunk of blade into wood and pushes harder.

_8:15 am_

He moves onto practicing his Gentle Fist. With slow deliberation he goes through the motions of his clan's signature fighting style. He starts slow and then increases his tempo until he is moving at a speed that no one else can keep up with (except for one, his mind whispers). His Byakugan is activated because he wants to increase his endurance in using it.

He is still too weak as his Byakugan succumbs to his internal desires and spots a chakra signature that is long gone.

_9:30 am_

On cue, Neji begins to practice his ninjutsu. Although he rarely relies upon it, he does have element affinities because he is a high level shinobi. Two - water and earth. No surprise that he be the most grounded and the most firm of all the elements. But there used to be someone else by his side who could fly, who was bright and sharp like fire and light and free like air.

Today, the wind caresses Neji's face under no one's control.

_10:30 am_

Normally, this is his break. Today, he decides to work on his genjutsu-breaking techniques. He focuses on channeling energy enough to disrupt somebody else's out of his body. This requires more concentration than any other type of fighting style and it is somewhere he excels.

He ignores the part of him that hopes that when he opens his eyes she will be there and it will all have been a lie.

_11:00 am_

When the tattoo on his arm pulses - he is being summoned to the Hokage's office - he responds almost immediately. It is a coincidence that the time he lingers is the same time it takes to reseal weapons into a scroll. It is also a coincidence that he naturally sidesteps to avoid chakra strings.

Neji takes off towards the heart of the village, but her ghost follows him like always.

_11:05 am_

He meets the Hokage and is assigned another mission. He is to leave later that day and is explicitly ordered to rest before then. He bows obediently and he could swear that he hears fabric rustle beside him. In his peripheral vision he sees brown, lighter than his own. The Hokage is watching him critically so he dares not glance over.

He takes the scroll and reminds himself that there is nobody to share his thoughts with.

_12:00 pm_

Clean from his shower, Neji is surprised by Lee, who drags him to a get-together with the other members of their famous generation. On the way there the former teammates stand too far apart, the space in between big enough to fit another person. Their glue is missing and there is no one to tolerate Lee's exuberance and translate Neji's silence.

Lee has long stopped trying to be her.

_12:30 pm_

Neji wants to leave. He has no reason to socialize with these people he barely sees, much less knows. He sees the female shinobi gathered together and talking animatedly, sees how all three are so close without any room for another person, and he is suddenly angry. It is an illogical type of rage but he is furious nonetheless.

There is a calming hand on his shoulder but since it is Nara's instead of her's it does nothing to soothe him.

_1:30 pm_

Lunch is over and he heads back to the training grounds to meditate. Considering the relentless sun above, he chooses a more shaded spot and settles into a cross-legged position. It takes much longer than he is comfortable for him to find a balance.

When he first began to meditate it was a solitary activity but somewhere along the way it no longer feels right doing it alone.

_3:30 pm_

He stumbles upon Hanabi with a boy (16 year old Hanabi who is susceptible to false words like "I love you"). He goes to move in, to break the two apart when he can hear _her_ whisper. She tells him to look, to see with his incredibly blind-at-times-eyes that the young couple is happy. She tells him that they were once like that, and to let them enjoy it until his today is reality for one of them.

He turns away because she has always been right when it matters.

_5:00 pm_

In the Hyūga Complex he dons his outfit and his armor, strapping a katana to his back. He then places his porcelain mask on his face, every contour of his face melding perfectly with the specifically molded mask. Once, somebody molded against him perfectly.

Ghost fingers tap his throat, reminding him of his neck guard.

_10:00 pm_

He takes a break and builds camp for the night. He nearly settles into their old routine but remembers that tonight he is both the guard and the trap layer. There is no fire that he builds, the only other living thing for miles. While he sits by the flames he studies the scroll again and again, analyzing his target and everything that can go wrong. Rest is god but he is an atheist.

There is no one to tell him when to stop, and it is a long time before he falls asleep.

_4:30 am_

Neji awakes and for a moment he forgets.

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><p>Thoughts? I wanted to try a new style of writing...<p> 


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